{"id":220,"date":"2015-04-22T13:13:00","date_gmt":"2015-04-22T13:13:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.littlewanderingwren.com\/2015\/04\/have-bulls-pens-can-travel.html\/"},"modified":"2015-04-22T13:13:00","modified_gmt":"2015-04-22T13:13:00","slug":"have-bulls-pens-can-travel","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.littlewanderingwren.com\/staging\/8794\/2015\/04\/22\/have-bulls-pens-can-travel\/","title":{"rendered":"Have Bull\u2019s Pen\u2019s can travel!"},"content":{"rendered":"
\n
<\/div>\n
\n
I\u2019M READY TO FLY THE NEST\u2026<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
Three months in Europe<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
with a stop over in Singapore.<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
Here I come!<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n

<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n
<\/a><\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
\n
I think I have remembered to pack everything.<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
Certainly anything remaining has been <\/span><\/b><\/div>\n
washed, polished and tidied away.<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n

<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n
Well, maybe not in the study…<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n
\n
 I am not Wonder Women!<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n
 I\u2019ve been busy.<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n

<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
The house is clean, <\/span><\/b>and all the sheets changed.<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
Car was washed, <\/span><\/b>and I even vacuumed the soccer muddy car mats.<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
My yoga mat is rolled and stored<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
Surely I will be Zen enough, without yoga for the duration\u2026<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
<\/a><\/div>\n
\n
<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
I have had appointments galore from the hairdresser,<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
to my mammogram.<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
I\u2019m fit to leave!<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n

<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
<\/a><\/div>\n
\n
<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
The dog\u2019s also had the right royal treatment.<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n
He’s been clipped, scrubbed <\/span><\/b>and had his nails done.<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
Snap! Me too!<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
 Well if the Crazy Poodle gets a pedicure, <\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
then so do I\u2026<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
He\u2019s got a shiny new bling bone dog tag <\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
with new contact phone numbers<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
and along those lines, <\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
I\u2019ve told Security, <\/span><\/b>not to phone me when the house alarm goes off<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
because a spider has walked across the sensor.<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
Although, thinking about it, it’s unlikely <\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
as I’ve dusted all cobwebs away…<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n

<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n
Does anyone else do this, before a holiday?<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n
Go into manic, overdrive & leaving<\/b><\/span><\/div>\n
a house that is neater, cleaner, tidier than normal?<\/b><\/div>\n
I thought I’d remembered everything…<\/b><\/div>\n

<\/b><\/div>\n
<\/a><\/div>\n
<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
AND then I remembered the dog food!<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
Rats! I am happy to leave the kids no food<\/a><\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
they are all adult enough to fend for themselves,<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
but Mutt, well he\u2019s a different story!<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
So off I trot down to our local Pet shop<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
Where a very nice young man <\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
suggests a new all Australian dog food \u2018Meals for Mutts\u2019<\/i> <\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
I take a humongous sack of salmon and sardine, <\/span><\/b><\/div>\n
good for his coat!<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
<\/a><\/div>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
We\u2019ve just got enough time to introduce it gradually, <\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
to avoid any potential for an upset stomach\u2026<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
Ha, it never crossed my mind just to leave him with the big bag <\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
and trust to luck, <\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
The dog\u2019s got gastro! <\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
That would be a good family test…<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n

<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
Yes, I’m the only one going on this little adventure…<\/b><\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
\u2018So what about toys or chews? <\/span><\/i><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
I need to keep him happy and entertained, <\/span><\/i><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
I\u2019m gone a long while\u2026\u2019<\/span><\/i><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n

<\/span><\/i><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
<\/a><\/div>\n
\n
<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
At this stage I reckon if your vegetarian, vegan, <\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
or a just wee bit squeamish, <\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
then I\u2019d flick to your next blog\u2026 <\/span><\/b>

<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
And even if you\u2019re none of the above,<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
 I do apologise for what you are about to read\u2026<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
<\/b>
<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
:<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
:<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
:<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
:<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
v<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n

<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
\u2018Yes, I\u2019d recommend this bag of Bull\u2019s penis\u2019, <\/i><\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
the shop assistant says, looking a tad embarrassed.<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
\u2018Pardon?<\/i>\u2019 I say? <\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n

<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
Wondering whether what I thought I\u2019d heard, <\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
was correct?<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n

<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
I mean surely if this was in the UK or America, <\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
they\u2019d be a Ma’am or Madam, <\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
in there somewhere round the P word?<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n

<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
<\/a><\/div>\n
\n
<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
\u2018It\u2019s bulls penis\u2019 <\/i><\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
he repeated slowly, <\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
as if I was hard of hearing, although still whispering!<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
‘There\u2019s twenty in the pack and the dogs really \u2026’<\/i><\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
<\/b>
<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
I can\u2019t remember what he said next, <\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
as I\u2019m studying the packet intently.<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
\u2018It doesn\u2019t say that on the packet\u2019,<\/i> <\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
I say doubtfully looking at the Bullie Stick label\u2026<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n

<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
<\/a><\/div>\n
\n
<\/b>
<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
\u2018Yes, well, <\/i><\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
If they called it bulls dicks <\/i><\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
no-one would buy them, would they?\u2019<\/i><\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n

<\/i><\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
Oh my golly gosh. <\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
The language of the youth of today!<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
<\/b>
<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
There wasn\u2019t really any answer to this, <\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
except what I ended up saying<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n
and for some reason,<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n
 I drop all attempts at an Aussie accent<\/span><\/b><\/div>\n
and in my best British voice reply:<\/b><\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
<\/b>
<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
‘Oh, I see. <\/i><\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
Thank you very much, <\/i><\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
I will have a packet of those as well!’<\/i><\/span><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
<\/i>
<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
<\/a><\/div>\n
\n
<\/i>
<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
So I\u2019m sorry to have (yet again) <\/span><\/i><\/b>lowered the tone <\/span><\/i><\/b><\/div>\n
you’ll see why I had to doctor the <\/span><\/i><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
\u2018Have Bulls Pens, can travel\u2018 headline<\/span><\/i><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
You see if I\u2019d have used the word PEN\u2026..IS <\/span><\/i><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
I\u2019d have got all sorts of undesirables visiting my blog.<\/span><\/i><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
I\u2019m so glad it\u2019s just you, me and the dog, <\/span><\/i><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
I knew you\u2019d have a giggle!<\/span><\/i><\/b><\/div>\n

<\/span><\/i><\/b><\/div>\n
Here, have some Singapore orchids to brighten your day!<\/span><\/i><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
<\/i><\/b>
<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
<\/a><\/div>\n
\n
<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
So all sorted <\/span><\/i><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n
Let the adventure begin<\/span><\/i><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
\n
Next stop Singapore!<\/span><\/i><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
\n

<\/span><\/i><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n
<\/a><\/div>\n
Linking with thanks at <\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
<\/a><\/span><\/span><\/a><\/div>\n

<\/span><\/i><\/b><\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I\u2019M READY TO FLY THE NEST\u2026 Three months in Europe with a stop over in Singapore. Here I come! I think I have…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[32],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-220","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-crazy-poodle"],"yoast_head":"\nHave Bull\u2019s Pen\u2019s can travel! - LittleWanderingWren<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.littlewanderingwren.com\/2015\/04\/22\/have-bulls-pens-can-travel\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_GB\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Have Bull\u2019s Pen\u2019s can travel! - LittleWanderingWren\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"I\u2019M READY TO FLY THE NEST\u2026 Three months in Europe with a stop over in Singapore. 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